When I began this blog, I think my original intent was to communicate the difficulties of being gay, or the struggles that come from being in a gay relationship. Perhaps, at that time, my current problems were flooding my brain, and I felt like I had the most to say about that. As I've continued to write, I've begun to think otherwise.
The other night, when I was out with friends, I was approached by someone who hadn't normally hung out with us. Now, of course, this is always a bit awkward, because it's hard to figure out what to talk about, and I applaud him for attempting to make conversation with me. He was talking about a sport he played, and in an effort to make a connection with me, he mentioned that he played against the gay men's team in his league.
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"Oh, you've heard of that, right?"
No, actually, I haven't. And just because I'm gay doesn't mean that I have. There's more to me than that, said my mind.
Now, I'm not horribly offended by this, and I'm not trying to make a mountain out of a molehill. However, gay is not the first thing about me, and I'm not quite sure how to change that perception.
But then that got me thinking... I'm writing a blog called "Memoirs of a Gay Man." What am I telling people by naming my blog that? I am telling people that gay is the first thing about me, and it isn't.
Perhaps, we find the most unique thing about ourselves and others and latch onto that, letting it define us. Maybe that's not always a bad thing.
In my case, however, I'm realizing that as I continue to write, my messages aren't gay messages; they are messages that can apply to everyone. I'm realizing that being gay hardly makes me any different from the next person, and that many have encountered similar obstacles.
More so, I'm realizing I need to change the name of my blog. Comment below with ideas, please. I'd love some feedback.